Character Cafe

[Nohiki]

-> Throw the skull into dumpster, do some cocaine lines like you intended in the beginning before your half insane, half drunk mind decided to start a theatre career.

[Morty]

Asmodeus--> SCORE SOME COKE!!!

THIS COMMAND EFFIN' ROCKS. (and you do mean rocks) YOU CANNOT BELIEVE YOU HADN'T THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE NOW.
You promptly store the skull in one of your infinite pocket dimensions and do all the crack you can find.
Hell was never the same again.

[Nohiki]

-> Loves me / loves me notwith that pretty flower over thare (which is actually a knob from the central heating)

[Morty]

You pluck the delicate heating knob and begin tearing it apart with your evidently hulk-like strength, thinking about your darling Lilith. The heat rockets up to 85*C in 69 of the 420 districts of Luxuria Central. Just another ordinary day in Hell. You'll remember to make it rain later and take the shape of a long magic dog flying across the sky.

[Nohiki]

-> Where's my nephew? I have rocks to share. Also that friend of his needs some for the eyes.

[Morty]

Asmodeus--> COKE FOR EVERYONE!!

You track down your nephew and pelt him with rocks. Crack rocks. He is ever so grateful. He may even give you another skull. It's your birthday soon, as is wont to happen every four or five thousand years. Nope, no luck. Isky says he's holding on to this one. damn. You had big plans for that skull, after you let it collect a bit of dust in that Wrath museum.
You make a note to yourself to acquire crack rocks for Gorn's eyes(?). That is probably not the best medicinal use of crack rocks, but you couldn't care less for some reason. Better give some to his kids, too. Fun for the whole family!

[Nohiki]

-> Fun? seed the zombie disease in the middle of New york and watch the spread of the disease. Who says science can't be fun?

[Morty]

Oh yes, that's right! Tonight was the big unveiling of your latest project to counter Coryphaeus's movement. *Corvus, sorry, it's hard to keep remembering that most people know him as that now, ever since that particular debacle. Pretty risky move you pulled there with revealing his name to mortals. Of course it helped soften the blow a bit that you made them the ones to actually use it. You could have been in so much crap right now. But lucky your indisputable cleverness saved your hide.
You unleash the zombie plague on a terrified alternate!New York City. Blood spills. Flesh flies. It's pretty entertaining, actually. But probably not the best idea, since Corvus commands the plagues of this sector. Dog damnit! You should have remembered that. Now there's another 12 million people waiting to be processed in Wrath's corner of the underworld. Idiot!

[Nohiki]

Headdesk because you were raging right now, angry on yourself, thus feeding the other circle even more. Store zombies in a pocket dimension with the skull containing Corvus for him not to be able to do anything about it. Shapeshift the skull into trollface.

[Morty]

*headdesk* *headdesk* *headdesk* It's ok though because you can't actually die and be sent to Wrath, thus giving more power to Corvus. You have got to do something about that upstart young demigod. Moving the zombies to a reality where Corvus doesn't command plagues sounds like a good idea, even though that's probably against the rules somehow. You do it anyways. The zombies run free and frolick in the timeless void of another pointless pocket dimension. Poof!
Now for the skull... You can't really do anything to that because that's not the skull you have. You have a different skull. One of great personal importance to you, and also one of sentimental value. You'll get to that later.
Now, about that demigod...

[Nohiki]

Use mixed martial arts and turn him into a pretzel.

[Morty]

Asmodeus--> Use mixed martial arts and turn him into a pretzel.

That has got to be the dumbest command you've ever heard! You cannot turn a skull into a pretzel! And you certainly can't track down his body and turn that into a pretzel, that would be too weird. And would probably solicit some sort of revenge scheme. Hell forbid YOUR body get turned into a pretzel while you slept. That would be HORRIBLE!
Also you only took taekwondo and that strictly forbids turning anyone into a pretzel without provocation.

[Nohiki]

Some prince of hell you are, listening to an old man in a dojo. Switch to any other random character

[Morty]

Asmodeus--> Switch to any other random character.

You are now CORVUS.

F//ck your life. Not only are you trapped in an inescapable sealing skull, but that skull happens to be dangling around the neck of an idiotic 15-year-old boy. You are going to kill this pathetic f//cker so hard when you get out, he has no idea.
Actually, he has. You've been very descriptive to him about it in his dreams at night, detailing all the ways in which he is going to be permanently, painstakingly murdered. And, being a being of Hell, there won't even be a Hell for him to go to when he dies. Hahahahahaha. Beat THAT, dad.
This was all part of your plan. Try to take over the world, fail miserably, get trapped in a skull, get stolen by a kid. Then make that kid's life a living Hell. You are such a f//cking genius.

Who are you kidding. You hate your life.

[Nohiki]

-> hypnosis, make that moron trip and break the skull.